MSU Student Newspaper Features Jesus Christ In Smut Column...

An article mocking Jesus Christ that was intended for April Fool's Day but released just three days before Easter has been featured in Montana State University's student newspaper, 'The MSU Exponent.' The piece is located under their 'sexxxPonent' section and is titled 'The highest form of consent.'

Popular website Campus Reform was able to obtain a copy of the publication, which is funded via mandatory student fees.

Image Credit: Campus Reform

Transcription:

"Consent: it's probably the sexiest thing there is. Yet across campuses nationwide, there faces a national epidemic of this simple concept. That's why we here at The Excrement have decided to educate people on the topic in all its forms. The first thing that you need to ask yourself when you are hitting on someone is "have I got the go ahead to party?" And while you should be asking this of yourself and the person you are interested in, there's probably one more person you forgot. That's right: the Lord Almighty.

"After all, what could be sexier than spending a long day at work or in class, coming home, and getting on your knees opening your mouth for the Lord. There's nothing better than seeing a picture of the Lord with his massively shredded abs, abs so ripped that you would grate cheese on them.

"Look at that. Who are you going to ask for consent? Yourself, good. The person you're hitting on, of course. But the most important person to ask is that burly looking stud.

"Who do you think will protect you when you have sinful premarital relations? Because it sure as Hell not gonna be that condom you’ve been carrying in your wallet for four years on the off chance that you get lucky. It’s gonna be that beautiful, sin-absolving love muscle."

The story's picture features Jesus posing in a provocative manner while pulling up his undergarments to reveal his bare backside. Its caption: "Jesus turns the other Jeek (Jesus cheek)."

According to Campus Reform, "All students enrolled at Montana State University must subsidize the Exponent at the rate of $2.65 per semester. These funds are only available to the Exponent, and no other alternative student publications. There is no option to waive the fee."

At this time, it is unknown who wrote the article.